10 Things I Learned About Love from ‘Outlander’

#7: Fights are like fuel.

Outlander- Starz

Fighting, much like open communication, fosters intimacy. *Wink*

Ok, so in all seriousness, fighting is necessary. It can feel unnatural. It can feel like the entire world is crashing down on you, but I promise it’s not. Fighting is like fuel- you need just enough to light the fire. If you get more than you need, you might burn off your eyebrows or blow the whole dang place up.

I like metaphors, you guys.

Fighting needs to be productive. That is the truly hard part, and I’m not sure I have drawn any conclusions about *how* or *how not* to fight productively. If you find yourself holding grudges and bringing things up over and over again, that’s probably not productive.

But, if your fights allow you to find peace and move on with your person, let the peace sweep you away to a blissful place. Learn from the experience and you will, very likely, grow closer to the person you love.

The famous scene from Outlander season 1 where Claire and Jamie are screaming at each other after he’s spanked her… That was productive. Each person knew exactly where the other was, where they’d come from, and together they decided to move forward, to the same place.